I’m not going to get into the semantics of FAA regulation, and who’s technically wrong on paper here. Apparently the ticket purchased for the infant in this video was technically in an older child’s’ name, who was put on an earlier flight. The law is you can’t have a different person in the seat who was on the ticket, and rules are rules. Whether its bullshit or not, convenient or not,  enforced on other flights or not it’s federal ( Airlines LOVE that word).  Unlike the last guy who looked like he was fresh of a round with Tyson, this isn’t going to see any lawsuits, or payoffs. Maybe a little public out cry about the one flight attendant telling this man his kids are going to be in foster care, but I would imagine he is probably fired by now.

Having said that, just pick your kid up an hold it when they ask you the first time.  I know he paid for the ticket and eventually even volunteered to carry him when the possibility of sleeping in a booth at an airport Chili’s entered his mind. Putting up a fuss with the airlines goes along the same lines as putting up a fuss with the police or a restaurant. The ball is in their court. They fly the plane, they carry they write the ticket, they prepare your food. Giving them a hard time will come back to bite you in the ass, especially when your not abiding by the rules.  You wait until after the transaction to put your two cents in. It’s midnight. Shove your kid in overhead storage and worry about getting your money back and complaining to corporate in the morning. Lets get this fucking bird in the sky.

The bigger point to take away here is how the cabin of a airliner has become the modern day coliseum. Battle royales happening every day. Passengers getting upper-cut, bunnies getting slaughtered, flight attendants threatening to break families apart. Total thunder-dome.  It’s amazing it hasn’t happened earlier. Everyone is running late, carrying a bunch of luggage, getting groped by rent-a-cops and over paying out the ass for necessary barbiturates, all while stressing over the possibility that someone is going to detonate their underwear at 30,000 feet. Its an incredible mixture of emotions that makes each and every traveler vulnerable to freak outs just like this.  We need to just start gassing these cabins so everyone just stays quiet and wakes up at their destination. Less fights, less law-suits, less terrorism, less-shitty airline food. You won’t give a shit about your leg room, and you certainly won’t have any crying babies.