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The Daily Mail- A man in Minnesota who was falsely declared dead by the IRS for 29 years has been brought back to life with the help of a US senator. Adam Ronning, 33, was first declared dead when he was four years old. As an adult, he has always paid his taxes, but either only got half of his return or none at all since 2009.

But thanks to Sen Amy Klobuchar, the Brooklyn Heights man was able to reverse the false declaration and the government now recognizes that Ronning is very much alive.The reasons behind why Ronning was initially declared dead are unclear. In May 1987, Ronning’s mother received a letter saying she could no longer receive child support after re-marrying because her son was declared dead. And yet, Ronning was very much alive. 

‘They blamed a computer glitch, but it has been “glitching” ever since,’ Linda Picard-Millette said.’It’s insulting, it’s shocking, it’s frustrating,’ father-of-two Ronning told KMSP. ‘I’d call and they were like, ‘let’s just give him the hold monster.’ I think it’s probably better than winning the lottery,’ he added. ‘It’s living, and being normal, instead of being on a list of dead people.’

Ronning said the government owes him approximately $20,000 in tax returns.

In a day and age where every little thing is documented and tracked, this guy got hit with the golden ticket and just decided to throw it in the trash.  I’m not sure he’s full aware  of the benefits of being dead on paper. Parking ticket? Throw that shit in the trash, its addressed to a dead man. DNA at the scene of a bank robbery? That guys dead already sarge, can’t be him. And the biggest perk, relatable to every American? No chunks of your salary are getting scooped up by Uncle Sam. No more taxes. If you’re not alive you don’t declare income, you’re not using the facilities and resources of the government. Pretty simple-No transactions between the IRS and a dead person.  Not applicable

Which is why its ABSOLUTE lunacy that this dude is fighting and clawing to be revived. At what point will he realize that technicalities are overrated. You know your alive. Your family and friends know your alive. Your fucking alive dude, and if the government wants to claim otherwise just roll with it. Fine, whatever I’m dead. Don’t ask me for, or hold me responsible for annnnnnnnnything. I’m not doing jury duty, not paying my taxes, not filing out a census, not voting feeling guilty about not voting, and if we get into World War III this summer and institute a draft? Well there’s one name I can guarantee you that’s not getting called. Getting off the grid is a near impossible task to accomplish these days, and this dude just slaps the clerical error gods straight in the face for gifting him a modern day invisibility cloak. Despicable.

And not for nothing Adam, you don’t really have the right to complain about not getting tax refunds when the IRS never asked for a single red cent in the first place. This isn’t pay it forward or anything. Just because you sent us money every year for no reason, doesn’t mean we have to send you anything back.  They didn’t request shit from you for the last three decades.Some clerk’s probably been using your tax check to pay his rent.  You could have just gone on your way, depositing your pay stubs, impregnating your wife for the 6th time, just living your life. Instead you decided to voluntarily play by the rules when you were lucky enough to be given a huge head start that nobody noticed.  What a sucker.